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16Feb

Twitter Updates for 2010-02-16

Author: Darrin Bell | Category: Comics, tweets, twitter | Comments (0) | Add Comment

I'm appearing @Wondercon in SanFrancisco on April 3 on a panel w/Keith Knight. I'll also be signing the new Candorville book. Details 2 come #
Yes, even if I have to sell them from my trenchcoat. RT @Tazamisha @candorville Will copies of your newest book be available at WonderCon? #

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15Feb

Twitter Updates for 2010-02-15

Author: Darrin Bell | Category: Comics, tweets, twitter | Comments (0) | Add Comment

New blog post: Candorville 3/28/09: Steeling the Spotlight, part 6 http://tinyurl.com/cp7fjw #
New site soon. In my day, there was none of this fancy css on the interwebs. We had HTML and beveled "click here" buttons and we liked it! #
About to watch wife in play called Narrow Road to the Deep North. Who knew you couldn't bring nachos to a play? #
New blog post: Candorville 3/29/09: The Five Year Plan http://tinyurl.com/czuby6 #
New blog post: The Flight, part 1 http://tinyurl.com/d7wpqn #
New blog post: <blink>Keep writing to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch</blink> http://tinyurl.com/cloftp #
Today's "Knight Life" made my day, even though I know it's a ruse 2 get me 2 buy a print:
http://tinyurl.com/cawplq #
Vampire chasing me, trying to drink blood. Peace out.
http://tinyurl.com/db98xl #
New blog post: The Flight, part 3 http://tinyurl.com/c3tm2t #
Turns out fiancee is evil vampire. Explains everything.
http://tinyurl.com/c3tm2t #
Told Saxon I'm suing Roxanne for custody. Turns out Saxon also vampire. http://tinyurl.com/c3tm2t #
Saxon chasing me through dark woods. Running 4 my life.
http://tinyurl.com/c3tm2t #
Screaming like little girl.
http://tinyurl.com/c3tm2t #
Tom Meyer @ SFChron latest editorial cartoonist 2 lose job. UR officially old when you've been around long enough to outlive a profession. #
New blog post: The Flight, part 4 http://candorville.com/2009/04/02/the-flight-part-4/ #
Vampire closing in. If I don't make it, some1 feed my goldfish.
http://tinyurl.com/cht8vx #
New blog post: DETROIT drops Candorville – Write to the Free Press http://candorville.com/2009/04/02/detroit-drops-candorville-write-to- … #
Hollywood took over my block again to film pilot. City figured parking wasn't impossible enough already. http://twitpic.com/2qnqe #
http://twitpic.com/2qocz – Hollywood took over block again 2 film pilot called "let's see Darrin find a parking space now." #
New blog post: The Flight, part 5 http://candorville.com/2009/04/03/the-flight-part-5/ #
Somehow got away from vampire.
http://tinyurl.com/cfblpd #
Maybe 'cause sun came up. Anyway, stumbled and fell off cliff.
http://tinyurl.com/cfblpd #
In free-fall. Can see city from here. Think I see my apartment.
http://tinyurl.com/cfblpd #
Uh oh, client papers subscribing 2 my Twitter feed. Now I can't post updates on search 4 left sock unless I figure out how 2 make it witty. #
Watching Jay Leno interview Miley Cyrus. Zoned out. Brain emptied. Achieved zen state. This could save Buddhist monks an awful lot of time. #
New blog post: The Dallas Moment http://candorville.com/2009/04/04/the-dallas-moment/ #
Obama's going 2 bat 4 failed corporate execs who want your taxes 2 fund their bonuses. He really is. http://bit.ly/15EBuq #
New blog post: Princess http://candorville.com/2009/04/05/princess/ #
Don't know whether to go to the gym or go hiking. Maybe a few hours of TV will help me decide. #
Hope you all watch "kings" 2night at 8 on NBC. One of my favorite new shoes, which means it'll probably be canceled. Save it from me! #
Went 2 gym. Why, in 21st century, has mankind gotten rid of polio leprosy & parachute pants but still hasn't gotten rid of communal showers? #
New blog post: Terminal Velocity, part 1 http://candorville.com/2009/04/06/terminal-velocity-part-1/ #
New blog post: Terminal Velocity, part 2 http://candorville.com/2009/04/07/terminal-velocity-part-2/ #
New blog post: Terminal Velocity, part 3 http://tinyurl.com/ctepz7 #
http://twitpic.com/306gm – Heading up mountain even though rain clouds all around. Well, 1, but it's taunting me. If I don't make it, te … #
Still in free-fall. Ground closer now. Getting nowhere with HMO. Will call Massacard 2C if I can afford ambulance.
http://tinyurl.com/ctepz7 #
Buzzards circle below, just gliding. Must be 1 hell of an updraft down there. Hope I don't hit them as I plummet.
http://tinyurl.com/ctepz7 #
"The arc of history is long, but it bends toward justice." Iowa, Vermont, DC, & more prove MLK right again.
http://tinyurl.com/dcvkk9 #
http://twitpic.com/30qiu – @WebSmith I'm hoping we get Medicare for all by the time I hit the ground. #
New blog post: Terminal Velocity, part 4 http://tinyurl.com/dhtpe7 #
New blog post: Terminal Velocity, part 5 http://tinyurl.com/djc76x #
New blog post: Terminal Velocity, part 6 http://tinyurl.com/dkj4na #
New blog post: Race to Witch Mountain http://tinyurl.com/ca8eeb #
For some reason, I'm on Tokyo time. Which would be fine if I wasn't in LA. Why can't I get to sleep? #
New blog post: How to Save Newspapers http://tinyurl.com/c5wxaa #
Watching reckless driving scene in AnnieHall. Had PTSD flashback 2 the time I rode shotgun in Stephan Pastis's car while he looked 4 an ATM. #
Just got off phone with producer looking 2 option Candorville. Worst case, this falls through, I get "frustr8d Hllywood writer" street cred. #
Wow. Started a tweet about site redesign & designer emails me. Will tweet about unknown rich cousin dying, leaving me $, & see what happens. #
Finally accepted fact Laura has no time 2 watch Smallville w/me & deleted it from the DVR 2 make room. Will fly flag at half-mast 2morrow. #
New blog post: The Promotion, part 2 http://tinyurl.com/csz78s #
New blog post: The Promotion, part 3 http://tinyurl.com/ckwo3q #
New blog post: The Promotion, part 4 http://tinyurl.com/cz9haj #
New blog post: The Promotion, part 5 http://tinyurl.com/csljgd #
So Obama outs torturers but won't prosecute them & will defend them against any lawsuits. Axiom's wrong: Justice isn't blind, it's a eunuch. #
Now "just following orders" IS defense 4 war crimes. Thnx, Obama. Time 2 self medic8. Cure for affront 2 justice: watch 2 "Gunsmoke" reruns. #
Here I was worried that papers r dying, & relative gets laid off, has no place 2 live & kids may have 2 go live w/ ex. Where's HIS bailout? #
Just turned in @pearls-before-swine / @Candorville crossover strips. In papers week of April 27. Follow-up to series I ran last year. #
New blog post: The Promotion, part 6 http://tinyurl.com/cwbnbk #
New blog post: Insult to Injury http://tinyurl.com/d28tz7 #
New blog post: Gotta Go, part 1 http://tinyurl.com/dgu69j #
Secret ingredient in chicken tacos at H'wood & Serrano El Pollo Loco apparently is burning it & grinding it underfoot. Most ghetto EPL ever. #
New blog post: Gotta Go, part 2 http://tinyurl.com/dhk4gn #
Wow. El Pollo Loco CALLED me about crushed taco, invited me in2 "make it right." think I'll complain about aging & C if they can fix that 2. #
RT @TrekMovie I've done it again. Got my new favorite show canceled by liking it too much. R.I.P. "Kings." http://tinyurl.com/dczyym #
New blog post: Gotta Go, part 3 http://tinyurl.com/d6rsdc #
Driving on Santa monica right now. Jerk in front of me won't stop talking on his cell phone. #
Would I be overreacting if I called 911 to complain about iPhone elbow? #
New blog post: Gotta Go, part 4 http://tinyurl.com/ckg33d #
Watching MSNBC. Guess what sen. Bond (R) just likened to a banana republic: was it (a) torture, or (b) prosecuting those who tortured? #
New blog post: Gotta Go, part 5 http://candorville.com/2009/04/24/gotta-go-part-5/ #
Went back 2 El Pollo Loco incognito on Sunset after they called me 2 apologize profusely 4 lousy service&food. Best taco ever. EPL rules. #
New blog post: Gotta Go, part 6 http://candorville.com/2009/04/25/gotta-go-part-6/ #
New blog post: Why You Talk So White? http://candorville.com/2009/04/26/why-you-talk-so-white/ #
New blog post: The Owl of Minerva, part 1 http://candorville.com/2009/04/27/the-owl-of-minerva-part-1/ #
Readers, semi-crossover time: today and tomorrow, read Candorville first and then read Pearls Before Swine. #
RT @comicriffs Candorville made the latest "Post Power Rankings" thanks 2 WaPo readers and my pals at Diebold http://tinyurl.com/dx8xqs #
Hiking now. Did you know rattlesnakes are very, very fast? In unrelated news, I wonder if Target has a sale on underwear right now. #
New blog post: The Owl of Minerva, part 2 http://tinyurl.com/datnc4 #
2009: Arlen Specter switches parties. A black president, a 61 seat Senate majority & a woman Speaker. Man, people REALLY didn't like Bush. #
Oops. Meant to type "60"-seat majority. #
New blog post: The Owl of Minerva, part 3 http://tinyurl.com/d8ofcj #
New blog post: The Owl of Minerva, part 4 http://tinyurl.com/da83ra #
I got chills when I drew today's Dr Manhattan cameo. Don't know if it was an intense geekgasm, or the swine flu. http://tinyurl.com/da83ra #
Damn. Site's down. Second time this year. Anyone know a really reliable hosting company that'll fix this kinda thing automatically? #
Forgot to say: My site runs on Wordpress, so I need a more reliable Wordpress-friendly host that won't screw up my site four times a year. #
Site's back up! Safe to check out Dr. Manhattan's cameo now. Http://tinyurl.com/da83ra #
New blog post: Site was down, now it's up http://tinyurl.com/dgmju3 #
New blog post: The Ghost Paper http://tinyurl.com/dkpryh #
New blog post: The Owl of Minerva, part 5 http://tinyurl.com/dfuwqj #
Guess I shoulda made a color guide 4 yesterday's Dr Manhattan cameo. Papers colored him Caucasian sted of blue so he looked like a stripper. #
#PvP and #PennyArcade fans, you'll want to see who cameos in today's #Candorville http://tinyurl.com/dfuwqj #
Oops. Fixed twitcode: @PvP and @PennyArcade fans, you'll want to see who cameos in today's @Candorville. http://tinyurl.com/dfuwqj #
Aaargh! 1 more time: @pvponline & @tychobrahe fans, you'll want to see who cameos in today's @Candorville. http://tinyurl.com/dfuwqj #
RT @pvponline "Syndicated cartoonists are mentioning …my characters… This concerns me not." Just taking the time 2 say I care even less. #
New blog post: Candorville's been Huffed http://tinyurl.com/ddd7j6 #
New blog post: Secession http://candorville.com/2009/05/02/secession/ #
New blog post: Buddha's Belly http://tinyurl.com/cgjrrz #
New blog post: Checking in on the state of the Republican Party http://tinyurl.com/d3l864 #
New blog post: Just Following Orders, part 1 http://tinyurl.com/c9v4o7 #
Though he won't let em near his kids, Joe the Plumber sez "I've had some friends that are actually homosexual." Can C why that's past-tense. #
New blog post: New Commenting System – what do you think? http://tinyurl.com/c76sqx #
New blog post: Just Following Orders, part 2 http://tinyurl.com/cyx2ck #
Latest theory: Only timeless Prince jams ones he made with The Revolution. All others only sound good if wearing parachute pants & flat top. #
New blog post: Just Following Orders, part 3 http://bit.ly/Cd3yi #
New blog post: Comparing Our Torture to Japan's Torture? http://bit.ly/kFItS #
gave 10¢ to http://tipjoy.com/- TechCrunch #
New blog post: Just Following Orders, part 4 http://bit.ly/LUAaS #
A few peeps R confused. I'm not saying we're just as bad as the Imperial Japanese Army. Here's what I AM saying: http://tinyurl.com/cfxj4d #
New blog post: Just Following Orders, part 5 http://bit.ly/qxsjz #
New blog post: The Twit http://bit.ly/dP8SY #
I've now spent four hours trying to decide whether to go hiking or to the gym. Could've done both by now. #
New blog post: The Somali Pirate Solution http://bit.ly/sMSAe #
New blog post: The Final Frontier, part 1 http://bit.ly/icYZl #
Sitting in theater watching Star Trek 47th time. Ushers, cops want me 2 leave. Nachos running low. Adult diapers R comfy
http://bit.ly/icYZl #
New blog post: The Final Frontier, part 2 http://bit.ly/17PuHa #
Watching #startrek again. Cops ordering me out of theater. Pimply 14 year-old usher tells cops "careful, dude's crazy."
http://bit.ly/17PuHa #
Why is #startrek so good? Chris Pine making me 4get The Shatner. Cops shouting now.
http://bit.ly/17PuHa #
Maybe I should show cops I have 200 tickets in pocket.
http://bit.ly/17PuHa #
Shouldn't have reached in pocket. Cop knee on neck making it hard 2 type.
http://bit.ly/17PuHa #
New blog post: The Final Frontier, part 3 http://bit.ly/URoAy #
Neighborhood's cable TV & Internet are down. Haven't felt this much peace&quiet since last time they went down. Scary. Lucky I have iPhone. #
New blog post: The Final Frontier, part 4 http://bit.ly/URSCC #
New blog post: Star Trek vs. Star Wars http://bit.ly/XCNwi #
New blog post: The Final Frontier, part 5 http://bit.ly/wppFZ #
New blog post: A Man of Many Cities http://bit.ly/vEGhx #
New blog post: That Said… http://bit.ly/FlZ2e #
New blog post: Two roads diverged in a wood… http://bit.ly/TTXPw #
It was as manly as any hunt. From behind the glass I scoped the orange chicken. I knew only one of us would survive… http://bit.ly/TTXPw #
New blog post: Mother's Day, part 1 http://bit.ly/7bPDk #
Was almost cast in #Heroes season 4. Special power would've been getting TV shows canceled just by liking them. Part was right up my alley. #
Rifling thru guy's medicine cabnet. Is it just me or does Finasteride sound less like prost8 medicine & more like erectile dysfunction pill? #
New blog post: Mother's Day, part 2 http://bit.ly/13q6r1 #
New blog post: The Freeloader Myth http://bit.ly/WFaUi #
New blog post: Doctor Dog, part 1 http://bit.ly/OKlus #
Following every crazy rich person on Twitter in case one of them leaves his fortune to his followers. Can cross "plan retirement" off list. #
I am so double-plus ungood at Adobe Indesign. If this next Candorville book is 350 blank pages, I'll buy a cat & blame it on him. #
New blog post: Doctor Dog, part 2 http://bit.ly/iI37L #
Dick Cheney just refuses to get off my TV. Apparently during the years 2001-2008, his secret undisclosed location was the year 2009. #
New blog post: Doctor Dog, part 3 http://bit.ly/11TEaU #
At National Cartoonists Society convention in Hollywood. Sent Lalo Alcaraz to get me a White Russian. Hope he knows I meant the drink. #
New blog post: Doctor Dog, part 4 http://bit.ly/C9GbM #
JJ Abrams is in my NCS biz meeting 4 some reason. Will tell him next Trek needs more cartoonist captains. http://yfrog.com/0weotnj #
I consented 2 have my photo taken with some guy named "JJ" http://yfrog.com/1461hnj #
Reubens wrapping up. Not sure why I didn't win best comic strip just now, but I suspect it had something to do with not being nominated. #
Tatulli ("Lio") wins best comic strip, pantomimes acceptance speech before punching "Family Circus's" Bill Keane in the spleen. Cops coming. #
New blog post: Tired of the Blame http://bit.ly/MfGpg #
Tom Ridge sez Obama being "political" by "looking backward" 2 justify current 4n policy. I thought that was called "learning from history." #
New blog post: Good News or Bad News, part 1 http://bit.ly/DUiWm #
New blog post: Good News or Bad News, part 2 http://bit.ly/mtntL #
Hiking. 60+ yo man struts by w/red bandana hangin from back left pocket. How'd gang member get 2 live so long? He must've been on desk duty. #
Heard CA banned a great threat to marriage. Panicked until I realized this wasn't about banning booze, football, or Vegas. #
New blog post: Good News or Bad News? Part 3 http://bit.ly/b6rFf #
Watching black prop8 supporters on TV gleefully extoll "will of voter." If it'd been left up2 voters we'd still have separ8 water fountains. #
There's a reason the civil rights movement was fought in the courts: the scared masses will ALWAYS vote against people who aren't like them. #
Picked up new client-stirs college memories. Driving from UCB thru redwoods, deer, drunken mud-covered naked people… Gotta luv Santa Cruz. #
White woman rolled eyes @Latina yardworker, saw Laura &me & rolled eyes again. How big a showoff RU if ur flexin ur EYE muscles 4 strangers? #
New blog post: Good News or Bad News? part 4 http://bit.ly/1F90h #
Every1 ignoring context of her speech. Judge Sotomayor sez life xperience would lead 2 wiser decisions in SEX AND RACE DISCRIMINATION CASES. #
Just smacked down forum-dweller bitching about #BSG at TrekBBS. Haven't been in a nerd-fight in quite some time. Invigorating. I feel alive. #
Flashy graphic. Blitzer says WH wants both Palestinians & Israelis 2 follow existing plans. Only on cable is STATUS QUO "breaking news." #
New blog post: Good News or Bad News? part 5 http://bit.ly/4oeV73 #
Heard Archie will propose 2 Veronica. If they stay true 2 the comix (he always ended up w/2 dates on same night), he'll marry her AND Betty. #
Tom Tancredo (R) is right: La_Raza IS just like the KKK "except for the hoods and the nooses" (& the violence & the racial supremacy thing). #
New blog post: The Appointment http://bit.ly/V0CPs #
Hiking. 6 taggers ruining hillside on my favr8 path. Opened mouth 2 drop some life-changing wisdom on 'em, all that came out was "not cool." #
New blog post: What Time It Is? http://bit.ly/VPuRF #
Anyone else having iTunes problems? First all apps on iPhone stopped working. Then tried logging into account on iTunes & got error message. #
My iPhone apps won't open & I need their data b4 I restore. How can I see the directories & drag files stored by 3rd party apps to my Mac? #
Fixed #iPhone by restoring from oldest backup. Wonder if I can also fix credit score that way. #
New blog post: Where's Cheney? part 1 http://bit.ly/ahbGD #
#Candorville starts in Santa Cruz Sentinel 2day. Will break in2 stands & autograph all papers when there this weeknd. Hope fans have bail $. #
Walking thru supermarket, noticed a vibrating razor. 5 sharp blades. Vibrating. Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Naturally I bought it. #
Note 2 self: go on Amazon.com, buy shoulder-mounted insect-devouring lizard for next mid-day hike through Griffith Park. #
REALLY weird vibe in #Griffith_Park 2day. Guys keep stopping mid-trail& staring@me&each other. Finally stared back&1 dude ducked bhind tree. #
New blog post: Fan-Made "Green Lantern" Movie Trailer http://bit.ly/4A9Sb #
New blog post: Where's Cheney? part 2 http://bit.ly/VJoLm #
New blog post: Where's Cheney? part 3 http://candorville.com/2009/06/ #
Just saw Tom Hanks get smashed by huge meteor on Tonight Show. This was actually the original ending 4 "Angels & Demons." True story. #
There were clouds today but no rain. Then the sun came out & it rained. Now rain's gone but clouds are back. It must not be opposite day. #
. Where's Cheney? part 4 http://bit.ly/115mPj #
Ken Burns sent me ALL his documentaries in xchange 4 a signed Candorville print. Speechless now. http://yfrog.com/0nvulpayj #
Readers R funny. Use "you're" when u should use "your" ONCE & ur illiterate. Even though you've used your & you're correctly for 5 years. #
Ate a sandwich while hiking on the trail. Came home. Sat on couch & had trail mix for lunch. Something's wrong here. #
. Where's Cheney? part 5 http://bit.ly/9xvf7 #
On road trip to Santa Cruz. It's a tour of California wildlife: oxen, cattle, rest stop perverts… http://yfrog.com/29gjyj #
. Where's Cheney? part 6 http://bit.ly/JiSfW #
. A Rainy Day http://bit.ly/yNe05 #
Riding train thru majestic redwood 4est. Trees older than country. They'd make a gr8 bookcase & matching armoire. http://yfrog.com/5b5u9j #
Driving down PCH, looking at all the off-shore oil drilling rigs wrecking the view. Was about 2 complain, then I remembered we're DRIVING. #
RT: Dick Cheney just refuses to get off my TV. Apparently during the years 2001-2008, his secret undisclosed location was the year 2009. #
Previous post re-tweeted for new followers & because I used it in a strip yesterday. #
Glad to be home. It's just like the redwood forest I just visited, only with a lot less wood and a lot more plaster. #
. The IRS Letter http://bit.ly/K8Z1I #
. Twit Wisdom by Senator Grassley http://bit.ly/15JNAO #
It takes balls to publicly mock the IRS. But I'd like to keep mine, so I won't.
http://bit.ly/K8Z1I #
. The Unfit Parent, part 1 http://bit.ly/cZAzE #
At banquet, watched drunk friend accept award & tell a story about how the guy sitting next 2 me was killed by the cops. Best. Monday. Ever. #
. The Unfit Parent, part 2 http://bit.ly/15e67n #
88 year-old racist who denied Jews were victims of atrocities shoots up Holocaust Museum in attempt to win 2009 Irony Award. #
After Obama = Hate-mongers R shooting people cuz they fear their country is dying. Thank God it IS dying. I like the new one better. #
. Candorville 6/11/09: Sotomayor http://bit.ly/X9rUD #
. La Raza and the KKK http://bit.ly/ug1mu #
Called 2 ask bank 2 reverse newly-decreased credit line AND THEY DID. Gonna go buy lottery ticket & see where this unnatural luck takes me. #
GOP sez NO 2 public health plan b/c it'd kill HMOs. It'd be cheaper, more attractive & every1 would choose it. Yeah, save me from that, GOP! #
. The IRS Letter, part 2 http://bit.ly/DWjdf #
Grabbed "darrinbell" Facebook name in rush 2 beat 14 other Darrin Bell's. Regret not picking "BarackObama" instead. http://bit.ly/ohJHH #
. Dubble Cross Health Insurance http://bit.ly/85SRY #
Fox "News" tries 2 win 2009 Irony Award by being SHOCKED that we haven't stood up & said (2 Iran) "stealing elections is unacceptable." #
Paste yesterday's Candorville in2 your 2009 tax return, send me proof & be entered 2 win signed copy of next Cville book http://bit.ly/DWjdf #
. Feeling Lost http://bit.ly/OOW31 #
. The Credo, part 1 http://bit.ly/6YbaB #
. Senator Ensign demands Senator Ensign's resignation http://bit.ly/QXR0R #
. The Credo, part 2 http://bit.ly/8uuAf #
. The Credo, part 3 http://candorville.com/2009/06/18/the-credo-part-3/ #
Obama Inauguration posters are now back in stock if you didn't grab one the first time around: http://bit.ly/C99x #
The #IranElection battles sure are exciting. Their "Green Revolution" may actually bring about a kinder, gentler oppressive theocracy. #
Adventures in Idiocy: Just discovered #Indesign image catalogue script could do in 5 seconds wht ive spent the past 2 months doing by hand. #
Sen. Alexander (R) on CNN now. Sez govrun healthcare wastes 10% of its $$ so it's better 2 help poor buy private insurance which wastes 25%. #
I was thinking about running #DiskDoctor on my #Macbook to get rid of some bugs, but I don't want PETA coming after me. #
. The Credo, part 4 http://bit.ly/bABZY #
. The Credo, part 5 http://bit.ly/1733iw #
See America? THIS is how U respond 2 stolen elections. RT @Gul546 Video of Iran rally http://lurl.me/piseo4 #iranelection #gr88 #tehran #
. Schweinehund! http://candorville.com/2009/06/21/schweinehund/ #
. Fear's Second Chance, part 1 http://bit.ly/4gvkWp #
. Fear’s Second Chance, part 2 http://bit.ly/3AThtE #
. Fear's Second Chance, part 3 http://bit.ly/JbxzL #
A reader tells me today's comic is too arcane for my audience. I say Google & YouTube make concept of "arcane" arcane. http://bit.ly/JbxzL #
. Fear's Second Chance, part 4 http://bit.ly/tzwdp #
Watching paparazzi film of ambulance w/ Michael Jackson's dead body. Can't cameras EVER leave him alone? #
Now we'll NEVER know what "mama-say, mama-sa, ma-maku-sa" means. #
If any edcartoonists draw Michael Jackson moonwalking through the Pearly Gates I will personally beat them down w/ a sock full of quarters. #
. Fear's Second Chance, part 5 http://bit.ly/P3FFC #
. Fear's Second Chance, part 5 http://bit.ly/Myhyn #
I've got a sock full of quarters with Bruce Plante's name on it. Try harder, cartoonistas! RT @gnostinews Http://tinyurl.com/ly9gda #
. Moonwalking Through the Pearly Gates http://bit.ly/AtjoQ #
True story: Elderly reader just asked me about an Iran tweet I posted last week. Had to first tell him "twat" is not past-tense 4 "tweet." #
. New and Improved http://bit.ly/4Kmbg #
. The Irony of Freedom http://bit.ly/JuWZj #
About to watch two hours of huge robots blowing stuff up good. Hope I can follow the plot. http://yfrog.com/1745bj #
. The Green Revolution, part 1 http://bit.ly/YqtYK #
. Join the official Candorville Facebook page! http://bit.ly/WWH1Q #
#Transformers felt like a 3hr trailer for a better movie: PUNCH-JOKE-KICK-T&A-EXPLODE-slo-mo-YELL!!!-Cut 2 black. PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH …moral #
. The Green Revolution, part 2 http://bit.ly/hKKJ5 #
On a newsgroup right now debating yesterday's cartoon with people who seem intent on proving me right: http://tinyurl.com/nslnwf #
Zombie editors from 1950 censored my Michael Jackson cartoon, but I'll run the real one on my website next week anyway. #
. The White Screen of Death http://bit.ly/Fb65 #
. The Green Revolution, part 3 http://bit.ly/o4ydO #
. The Green Revolution, part 4 http://bit.ly/EAswO #
patiently waiting for the Media to move into its "has there been too much MJ coverage?" phase. #
. The Green Revolution, part 5 http://bit.ly/MNAm7 #
. The Green Revolution, part 6 http://bit.ly/2Tlz1T #
. Today's comic is working now http://bit.ly/QhlwD #
. The Adult Sippy Cup http://bit.ly/3MtXE #
. Pretty Young Things, part 1 http://bit.ly/qvv3C #
. Pretty Young Things, part 2 UNCENSORED http://bit.ly/hmal7 #
Well, it's not called "Whitewashville, is it? RT @gonzo_lust @candorville today's newspaper strip was NOT FUNNY! Shame on you. #
My editors censored today's Candorville strip 4 papers, but there's always the Web! See the director's cut at http://tinyurl.com/nxuy74 #
Anyone know a good, painless, gentle dentist near Hollywood CA? I don't mind pain of course, but I've got this "friend" who's a big baby. #
Channel 4 just spent about 3 minutes marveling at how well-behaved the crowd is @ the Staples Center MJ memorial. What'd they expect, riots? #
Grand Wizards @Channel 4 news still amazed "hooligans" aren't ruining the MJ Memorial. "But… this is a crowd of all races" they conclude. #
. Pretty Young Things, part 3 http://bit.ly/RPyCz #
. Pretty Young things, part 4 http://bit.ly/OBCQl #
. Pretty Young Things, conclusion http://bit.ly/XskSB #
End of the Michael Jackson series. One thing's for sure: I won't have to beat myself down with a sock full of quarters: bit.ly/XskSB #
. "Michael Jackson" Candorville series available as a poster http://bit.ly/KkahR #
Rev. Jackson said there should B special place in hell 4 grave robbers. There should B special place in PRISON: beneath big horny cellmates. #
Outside my windowz fire escape ladder, beautiful bird just hatched some baby birds. In unrelated news, trying 2 decide what 2 have 4 dinner. #
. The Epilogue: Elbow Strain http://bit.ly/rPSJZ #
This wk I heard from 98 people who know/like me but 4 some reason I was more concerned w/the 2 strangers who stopped following me on Twitter #
. Need just five more orders to order posters http://bit.ly/tKksg #
What do you do when your entire world unexpectedly comes crashing down around you? Aside from writing emo posts on Twitter, I mean. #
. Remember Iran? Part 1 http://bit.ly/HDfUI #
. Remember Iran? Part 2 http://bit.ly/EK4xn #
My bad. RT @brucegreenberg @candorville Nice stuff on Iran, but shouldn't you be covering who is going to get custody of MJ's kids? #
. Remember Iran? Part 3 http://bit.ly/1aC9cN #
Trying to interview Basij, Iran's secret police. But Basij only paying attention 2 people in green. #
Will put on green hat 2 get their attention. http://bit.ly/1aC9cN #
They don't see me. Raising hand, like at press conferences. http://bit.ly/1aC9cN #
Basij running over for interview. Will start w/softball question 2 form bond. http://bit.ly/1aC9cN #
. Remember Iran? Part 4 http://bit.ly/14J5Rw #
. Remember Iran? Part 5 http://bit.ly/18ixSs #
. Remember Iran? Part 6 http://bit.ly/hqqnV #
. Yellow Means Go Faster http://bit.ly/vf3rS #
. Operation Beagle Paw, part 1 http://bit.ly/Px8mx #
As I'm biking in STREET in GoldenGatePark, scared old lady on sidewalk yells 4 husband. He raises fist & yells "Get off your bike!" at me. #
. Operation Beagle Paw, Part 2 http://bit.ly/3QcYHf #
. Operation Beagle Paw, Part 3 http://bit.ly/QP9DH #
. Operation Beagle Paw, Part 4 http://bit.ly/TlRBF #
. Operation Beagle Paw, Part 5 http://bit.ly/YDCY8 #
. Turning the Corner http://bit.ly/11cJ9i #
. Reversal of Fortune http://bit.ly/wQWxE #
. Vacation, part 1 http://bit.ly/10Og8z #
. Vacation, part 2 http://bit.ly/13vXmQ #
. Vacation, part 3 http://bit.ly/17dHAH #
. Vacation, part 5 http://bit.ly/oV4Um #
There's a "special" place in Hell reserved 4 "people" who "express" derision by putting quotation marks where they don't "belong." #
. Vacation, part 6 http://bit.ly/Qejz3 #
. Room for Dessert http://bit.ly/uckhx #
. Vacation, part 7 http://bit.ly/4ezVIf #
. Vacation, part 8 http://bit.ly/uTPJh #
In LA. Hot, incredibly humid day + 10 mile bike ride alongside the exhaust-filled 5 freeway. What can possibly go wrong? #
. Vacation, part 9 http://bit.ly/UbCi0 #
Picking up teenage niece at LAX today. Plan on holding up sign that reads "Cuty-pooty Muffintop" to scar her for life. #
. Vacation, part 10 http://bit.ly/147NG6 #
Just sent out all the Michael Jackson posters, so if you ordered one you'll have it early next week. #
Just sent out all the Michael Jackson posters so if you ordered one you'll have it early next week. Http://tinyurl.com/n3avll #
. Vacation, part 11 http://bit.ly/VJzAt #
. Vacation, part 12 http://bit.ly/ECM2F #
I would never use my platform to exact furious vengeance upon those who wrong me. Funny vengeance, though, is another story. #
. The Telltale Sign http://bit.ly/18KBiW #
Spent all evening hunting fruit flies in my apartment, only to find out they don't make a very satisfying meal. #
. The Epiphany, part 1 http://bit.ly/2cAVgw #
This week's new. Gonna be 1 more vacation week next week. Unavoidable. Serious &$*# going down here, people. You'd understand if I told you. #
. The Epiphany, part 2 http://bit.ly/1Sxfbf #
. The Epiphany, part 3 http://bit.ly/3xhug6 #
Told cashier at Macy's I hadn't bought a new shirt in over a year. She thought it was strange till I reminded her I'm a guy. #
. The Epiphany, part 4 http://bit.ly/19L9eV #
. The Epiphany, part 5 http://bit.ly/3rGRoJ #
New blog post: A Special Place in Hell http://bit.ly/16wesi #
New blog post: Don't Answer That http://bit.ly/BJiyd #
I hope it's a good place. RT @IDJones942 Confession: @candorville is slowly taking over the place in my heart where Boondocks once resided. #
Darrin's Random Discoveries, part 784: Never ride the LA River Bike Path at dusk unless you like killing dozens of mosquitos with your face. #
New blog post: Check out the Candorville.com redesign http://bit.ly/ADj3g #
New blog post: Vacation, part 13 http://bit.ly/pu0Dy #
New blog post: Vacation, part 14 http://bit.ly/w2QP5 #
One reader's saying my site is blank. Do u see a brick bacground, nav buttons & stuff, or a plain white site at http://www.Candorville.com ? #
New blog post: Vacation, part 15 http://bit.ly/OJe2W #
Colbert, Stewart, Paint Drying Channel… Need I go on? RT @davidsirota Give me a compelling reason to continue my cable TV subscription? #
New blog post: Vacation, part 16 #
Just got back from 2013 where I watched Larry King interview Michael Jackson's neighbor's proctologist's dentist's hairdressser on CNNMSNBC. #
New blog post: Vacation, part 17 #
If there's no sequel to District 9 in *exactly* three years, there is no God. #
New blog post: Vacation, part 18 #
New blog post: The Outgoing Message #
I'm as shocked as you are. RT @commish24 @candorville No! Not Dick! Mark Trail, Dick Tracy, the dad from Family Circus–anyone but Dick! #
RT @jeffsonstein RT @candorville The Hots, part 1 http://tinyurl.com/msxjdy [we have *all* been there, on both sides of the conversation] #
RT @rainnwilson Was going to call 911. Found out it was government run. Called various ambulance Co.s to have them bid. Died while on hold. #
What's more outrageous: that Martha Stewart just asked rapper Q-Tip if heHas gold plated q-tips at home or that I'm watching Martha Stewart? #
New blog post: Sleeping With the Enema, part 4 #
A wise person once said "unless you tell me the name of the person you're quoting, the quote means nothing." #
If I could talk to any one person, living or dead, I think I'd rather do it living. #
GMail is down. I'm thumbing through Revelations to see if this is one of the signs. #
The GOP's going to have to repeal the 22nd Amendment if they're serious about having Dick Cheney run for a third term in 2012. #
Makes sense conservatives refuse 2 cover illegals. I believe Jesus once said "Heal the sick, unless they cannot document their citizenship." #
About to watch the Justice Society debut on Smallville. This is like porn for comics fans. Hanging "do not disturb" sign on front door. #
Was out till three. Awoke at 7 anyway. My internal clock needs a snooze button. Or a sledgehammer. #
Reader: "Most People could care less about [the issues you raise]." Me: "So YOU'RE this elusive "Most People" I've heard about all my life! #
I have a b-boy past. I was in both "Beat Street" & "Breakin'". Look closely & you'll spot me; I was the one watching them in the theater. #
Looking out my window at the sunset. If there's a God, It should teach Photoshop. http://moby.to/2cuz50 #
How long does a remote control have to be missing before the FBI will do something about it? #
Am I the last person to know the "<3" people were texting me is a "heart"? I liked it so much more when I thought they were mooning me. #
Most profound question ever, or most profoundest question ever: Why is there no "Apple Store" iPhone app? #
Unless i can download anew macbook pro from the app store, not the same thing. RT @swanksalot there is such a thing, just called App Store #